my heart, a brewing storm

We’ll do it all
Everything
On our own We don’t need
Anything
Or anyone

So would you?
No, you wouldn’t.

For all the years that I’ve known you baby
I can’t figure out the reason why lately
you’ve been acting so cold (didn’t you say)
if there’s a problem we should work it out
so why you giving me the cold shoulder now
like you don’t want to talk to me girl (tell me)
okay I know I was late again
I made you mad and dinners thrown in (the bin)
but why you making this thing drag on so long (I wanna know)
I’m sick and tired of this silly games(silly games)
don’t think that I’m the only one here to blame
it’s not me who’s been going round slamming doors

That’s when you turned and said to me
I don’t care babe who’s right or wrong
I just don’t love you no more

Rain outside my window pouring down
what now, you’re gone, my fault, I’m sorry
feeling like a fool cause I let you down
now it’s too late to turn it around
I’m sorry for the tears I’ve made you cry
I guess this time it really is goodbye
you made it clear when you said
I just don’t love you no more

I know that I’ve made a few mistakes
but never thought things would turn out this way
doesn’t make sense to me now that you’re gone (I see it all so clearly)
me at the door with you in a state
giving my reasons but as you look away
I can see a tear roll down your face

That’s when you turned and said to me
I don’t care babe who’s right or wrong
I just don’t love you no more

Rain outside my window pouring down
what now, you’re gone, my fault, I’m sorry
feeling like a fool cos I let you down
now it’s too late to turn it around
I’m sorry for the tears I’ve made you cry
I guess this time it really is goodbye
you made it clear when you said
I just don’t love you no more

Those simple words hit so hard
they turned my whole world upside down
girl you caught me completely off guard
on that night you said to me
I just don’t love you no more

Rain outside my window pouring down
what now, you’re gone, my fault, I’m sorry
feeling like a fool cos I let you down
now it’s too late to turn it around
I’m sorry for the tears I’ve made you cry
I guess this time it really is goodbye
you made it clear when you said
I just don’t love you no more.

Rain outside my window pouring down
what now, you’re gone, my fault, I’m sorry
feeling like a fool cos I let you down
now it’s too late to turn it around
I’m sorry for the tears I’ve made you cry
I guess this time it really is goodbye
you made it clear when you said
I just don’t love you no more

when my mind decides, it always seems so final. Yet, if you try hard enough, soften it will and quickly too.
But I’m gonna call a spade a spade. I cannot but feel a little confused. Nearing our end, a request was made- and heeded - that I toil these lonely hours on my own. Not to find another too quickly. Fine. Out of respect.

But u paint the town red in my hours of pain. I find that it reeks of disrespect. That while I try to toil my heart quietly, on my own might I add, you have the heartiest of smiles. No matter where or when. I am glad that you mourn our loss. A new introduction is in the clouds, I assure.

Respect begets respect.

Beautiful dawn - lights up the shore for me.
There is nothing else in the world,
I’d rather wake up and see (with you).
Beautiful dawn - I’m just chasing time again.
Thought I would die a lonely man, in endless night.
But now I’m high; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it’s hard to believe you remember me.

Beautiful dawn - melt with the stars again.
Do you remember the day when my journey began?
Will you remember the end (of time)?
Beautiful dawn - You’re just blowing my mind again.
Thought I was born to endless night, until you shine.
High; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it’s hard to believe you remember me.

Will you be my shoulder when I’m grey and older?
Promise me tomorrow starts with you,
Getting high; running wild among all the stars above.
Sometimes it’s hard to believe you remember me

Heard this last night. Stopped my night in its tracks and I spun. Spun my way home.
You’re not there.

I took that much needed trip to Bishan this morning. Loaded myself with mp4 player, this month’s Maxim and The New Paper as I try to kick the cab habit out of me once again. Train rides ain’t too bad. Just lose yourself into a book and hey! presto you’re there!

I knew you were so close. If you were home that is. I recall our little trip to Bishan one afternoon after my tournament. I think I either lost my game or didn’t get to play cos the rest of Siglap lost. Didn’t matter cos you were there to pick me up- in more ways than one.

My hands fidgeted with my phone. I wondered if it was wise of me to call. If you’d answer my call or let it ring itself into silence. Guess that wonderment wouldn’t be answered as I decided.

I am not angry with you. I never cld stay angry even if I tried. Still doesn’t take away what you once stood for. I get this feeling that you’re doing good. And school is starting, no? Gambatte ne, may your dreams be fulfilled as I just watch on from afar. Our chapter has ended but your life still goes on with the excitement of adult life beckoning.

I, too, wish you happy always. Always.